I'm having an artichoke for dinner tonight, but I needed to remind myself how to cook an artichoke. And Ask Your Neighbor.com seems to have had the answer to my question.
I'm really just posting this banal detail to test some backend stuff on the site, though I am having an artichoke for dinner. Have a nice evening!
fuck you
no, fuck you
No… Oh noooo….. Fuck me!
I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW HOW TO COOK ARTICHOKE.
THIS IS MY FIRST TIME I AM COOKING IT.
I GOT THREE SMALL ONE,S.I WANT TO COOK IT IN MY HOUSE ON THE STOVE
It is imperative that you screen the filthy language from your site. Find a way to it! These people are trash and I get the impression then that your site is the same. It is a cweertainty that I’ll not visit again
I agree, you must get rid of the filthy language, otherwise you will offend mealy-minded cunts. So fuck you.
wow, did I ever come to the wrong site! I just typed “Cook an Artichoke” at Google and this was the 1st website to click on and I got this… thanks guys
I thought we was all adults, here maybe you all should think about growing up!
ARTICHOKES RULE!!!!!!!!
You can all kiss my ass and if you need to find a link to cook your fuckin artichoke, go here:
http://www.askyourneighbor.com/recipes/159.htm
again. go fuck yourself
Ah, this is what I love about the Internet. The freedom of discourse, the liberty of expression, the elegant ramification of intelligent debate! Teilhard de Chardin would have been proud. What a pity that he hated artichokes.
I too am surprised to do a googlesearch for “cook an artichoke” and land here. Holy fucking shit.
I’ll be back when I need to steam some asparagus.
losers.
ya gotta admit….it’s all quite commical. i would have never guessed that in searching for cooking instructions i would run into such entertainment……so anyway, how DO i cook an artichoke?
Hi, for my summer school project my teacher wanted us to learn how to cook something new and write the recipe for class.All I see is a bunch of naughty words and no one will tell me how to cook an artichoke.
i like fucking artichokes
You dipships artichokes are fucking poisen. You are all going to die a horrible artichoke related painful fucking death.
It is ashamame to come to your site to learn how to cook something, I never thought I see the filth that is here
devereaux78: I think ‘ashamame’ is now my all-time favorite non-word. Mad props, yo.
Also: Sodomy, balls, spunk, cunt, and arsehole.
devereaux78: I think ‘ashamame’ is now my all-time favorite non-word. Mad props, yo.
Also: Sodomy, balls, spunk, cunt, and arsehole.
What the fuck is an artichoke anyway?
You all need to take a life lesson from Mr. Ozzy Osbourne, who once said, “Maybe it’s not too late to learn how to love, and forget how to hate.”
Hey, I typed “choke Artie Cook”? What’s this site? Who are all these fuckers?
FNORD
I was only searching for “Choke On Hearty Cock’ and I find this filth. It’s disgusting.
There are millions of honest, decent people trying to use the internet to educate themselves, and yet Google searches bring up this sort of filth.
I hope you’re all ashamed of yourselves… your mindless, illiterate profanity is preventing people like me from finding proper educational sites about shoving artichokes up our rectums.
What about the dadonkadonk butt?
Ash-a-may-may. That might be my new favorite word as well.
Down with artichokes, all hail Brocoli, the true king!
I’m sorely disappointed in the number of people who’ve commented on the language and then asked “So, how do I cook and artichoke.” If they actually read all of the words in order they’d see that “Fucker” (excuse the strong language) provided a link to an excellent web page on how to cook artichokes way back on the 17th June 2003. Stupid fucking cunts.
ashamame = shameful boiled soybeans.
and who the fuck was the first person to decide that an artichoke was edible? it doesn’t LOOK edible. go to castroville CA sometime and see for yourself.
it’s like asking who the fuck was the first person to suckle on a cow’s teat. “hmm, i think i’ll suck on this animal and see if anything tasty comes out!”
Well this thread due to it’s ease of being found in Google has earnt some notiraty…
I quote from http://www.oblomovka.com/,
“Do a google search for “cook an artichoke”. The top hit is pretty funny. It contains, as the friend who pointed it out says, “the most colorful discourse I’ve seen yet in an epicurial conversation”.”
Also I think ill post a like for a google search on my comments page.
Never mind cooking artichokes, why not vote for it? I shall personally nominate it for next year’s Vegetable Of The Year in pooclub’s annual election…
http://www.shite.org/cgi-bin/pooclub.cgi?p=clubnews&a=20020109
I was looking for ways of choking art…. vile stuff. Damn Turner prize…. all I got was you fuckers. Fuck you!
children
Fuckitty fuck fuck fucken cunt thistle FUCK ME! Artichoke.
Microwave:Fresh vegetable:More:Start.
Fuck you.
I soiled my armor while reading these postings.
The “ashamame = shameful boiled soybeans” pushed me over the top.
HAHAHAHAHA this is the funniest site ive EVER seen… thanks u guys ;) keep up the good work!
whatever
Who said we were all adults?
Where is the recipe? Although I don’t understand how to cook an artichoke, I am now very very horny. If the corner store is still open, I will fuck myself with an artichoke and maybe my downstairs neighbor too.
wow
thank you fucker.
I too was trying to figure out how to kook an artichoke. Didnt know i would end up to this shit hole of a site.
Did someone say they pee in your armor too? I thought I was only one.
You dont say whether it is a globe or jerusalem artichoke. The method of cooking, method of eating and scope for sexual congress with, or using, the vegetable would all be significantly different, depending on which it is.
The comments remind me of the old Persian saying: ‘A woman for duty, a boy for pleasure but a melon for ecstasy.’ A male point of view of course but then what woman would waste her time with this sad site?
Mr A
first butter the artichoke so it slides easily. Be sure and put the stem in first, as the other end will surely hurt- badly (i’m still recovering). Leave inside the annus for no more than two hours. Serve promptly in a white wine sauce.
The thing that really sucks, is that by the time this is all said and done…
I still don’t know how to cook an artichoke.
** sigh **
This garbage should b e removed from this site
thanks this site have been very helpful in teaching me “how to cook artichoke”
one question “do i need to wait for the artichoke to cool down after i take it out of my arse?”
This is a very informative and wholesome place to hang out with my homeys.
Glad I found it. And to think I was just trying to figure out how to boil an artichoke.
I like the comment from the MIT grad, “I thought we was all adults”.
Mindlord Rules the fuck!
An artichoke helped me get out of jail!!!
But I forgot my anal lube so I turned myself in…
I cooked the artichoke as instructed and I think it gave me AIDS
Here’s your artichoke instructions.
http://goatse.cx
To cook an artichoke:
1. Buy artichokes
2. Heat a pot on the stove until steam rises from it and sticking your finger in the water prompts a “OW!!! FUCK ME!!!”
3. Drop the artichoke in the water. (Be warned, if you don’t put it in head first, it will make a screaming noise and flail it’s claws frantically.
4. Dump some salt in the water. Cocaine can be substituted for a slightly varied result.
5. When the artichoke no longer floats, and sinks to the bottom, pull it out of the pot. (Use your fingers, forks are for pussies.)
6. Stick a toothpick in the artichoke. If it comes out clean, it’s done. If it comes out looking like it was shoved in a prostitutes ass, then put it back in the boiling water.
7. Cook until is appears that the artichoke is falling apart.
8. Remove artichoke from water. (Remember: Fingers!)
9. Throw the artichoke against the wall. If it sticks, then it is done, and you can enjoy your first home cooked meal of mashed artichoke!
ban brasstax for not saying NWS
btw asshat its COOK not kook you fucking gook
aww man, i wish this forum allowed pics
you are the ones who are the ball lickers
scoobysnack is a pussy
1) Catch the artichoke with a rope
2) Whisper to it until it settles down
3) Duct tape it so it doesn’t wiggle so much
4) Shove that fucker up your ass and cook at 98.6 degrees until you have to shit.
5) Eat that sumbeotch!
Man. Someday I gotta try that pissing in the armor thing.
You’re all a bunch of fucking pussies.
fuck you, ya fucking fuck
I’m choking on an artichoke.
I need the Himelich,
help, cough, wheeze.
If I swallow it, will it pass or get stuck in my sphincter?
Please respond soon, I am running out of saliva.
P.s. I do actually have a rather large sphincter, if that helps…
i wish someone would fuck me…
no ever says fuck me,
is there something wrong with me?
Except for that huge facial mole and the hair in it, I am like everyone else.
Please,
I’ll even do an artichoke!
No comment really, can I have a mint?
if you swallowed an artichoke, why are you not at the hospital?
No insurance.
Oh. OK, good luck with the sphincter thingy.
Thank you.
your welcome, I will pray for your sphincter that the lord has mercy on it and you.
God bless your sphincter and may God smite the unholy artichoke that has attacked your body.
You are too kind.
snot, shit, dick, pussy, fuck , goodnight.
a fun revision of typical artichoke recipes…
try sticking the artichoke up a cat’s ass first and then stick the cat up your own ass…
not only is it ready in half the time, but this method lends an almost almond taste… really much more palatable than most methods of cooking ive found…
100 things to do with an artichoke. Since you all have mentioned 90 things, here are ten more:
1. throw them at weddings instead of rice
2. use to create mad cow vaccine
3. organic body piercing (use your imagination)
4. repel midwesterners with an artichoke necklace
5. use for storing essential computer files, like this incredible pile of excrement.
6. hood ornament
7. maybe they could sleep with Michael Jackson
8. green party presidential candidate
9. 420
10. Charmin
this is my new favorite website. who knew needing to know how long to cook an artichoke was going to provide me with such brilliant entertainment.
so, if you want to know how to cook the artichoke:
http://www.askyourneighbor.com/recipes/159.htm
the site from up above
jacked from bob allison’s site:
Cut the top off about 1 inch down. Cut the tops off each leaf of the artichoke with a pair of scissors. Cut the stem on the bottom off. Put about 2-3 inches of water in a pot and bring to the boil. Place the artichoke in the pot and cover. Reduce the heat to a simmer and cook for 40-45 minutes. Clarify half a stick of butter to use as a dip. Note: You may cut a lemon in half and rub all the cut pieces with it to stop discoloring. Squeeze the remainder in the cooking fluid. Another caller said to drizzle a little olive oil and dry white wine in the water.
well its pretty obvious this peice of shit site isnt maintained.
Woops. wrong site. Could anyone instruct me as how to steam bearded clams?
Hmm.. the human capacity to complain never ceases to amaze me..
For christ’s sake.. stop complaining about google’s hit on your attempt to cook an artichoke. It’s a well known fact that artichokes are extremely obscene vegetables, so if this site bothers you that much, then you don’t want to cook artichokes anyway.
A good artichoke dip is mayo mixed with a bit of extra lemon juice. Of course, it looks like male spooge, so why go to the extra effort of squeezing a lemon when squeezing the wanker will do?
For Good Bearded Clams:
1. Make sure the clam is closed.(you dont want that horrible smell to take your breathe away)
2. Poke at it.
3. Try and look for the slit.(you may need hedge trimmers or mower, depending on how fat the clam is and well mantained)
4. Grab your salami and warm it up in your hand (you will find it more often than not you will need to do it yourself because the clam is rotton inside!!!!!!)
5. Pry that clam open and look around.
6. Look for my car keys! There in one clam somewhere!! $500.00 REWARD
7. Turn around and shoot your flaregun your going to die.
8. If the clam is very bearded abort the mission immediatly.
If anyone is interested I am selling a Rusty Trambone. There is a free hair pie involved!Serious inqueries only PLEASE 867-5309
wanted to see how to cook an arti and got a good laugh instead. Thanks.
I found this site after googling for ‘fuckitty fuck fuck’ so all of you are clearly choked in the head for trying to search for a cooked artichoke on the web, cause everyone knows an artichoke is made up of trits, or three-state digital logic, not bits, but only on alternate Thursday universes.
We really have to discuss the british invasion here, otherwise artichokes would never have risen to the permanently grandiose status they have, which is that of, along with anchovies, pineapple, and other deciduous trees, not belonging on pizza. Whatsoever.
And if you think that’s not a cautionary tail, try supergluing your tongue to the brake pedal while driving with your ankle down the highway at 73kph.
-Who??
Wow. you guys are a bunch of sick sadistic fucks. Don’t got anything better to do than come to an artichoke website and write stupid shit to each other? losers. Go find an artichoke….and then you can go fuck yourself!! At least, you’ll have something productive to do…
I tried cooking the choke in my shit-shooter, but I was recently sodomized by an air hose, so the artichoke was prematurely farted out. Luckily, it had already simmered in my hot ass juice jong enough to soften. I dribbled some olive oil and white wine on it and fed it to YOU, you fucking whore! Stay away from me with that hose. Or I’ll blow you with my rusty can of tuna!!!
I just want to thank the person who 1st wrote “fuck you”. Because of you all this contraversy started and provided about 8-10 minutes of entertainment. Also Kelli from 2 entries above, does the word ‘hypocrite’ mean anything to you?
What a filthy site ! One I’ll NEVER visit again !—–and the filthy minded wont even leave their e-mail addresses. They are too ashamed of their filthy sodomy mouths! May God have mercy and save you from your filthy minds. His WORD says ” The words you speak, they are spirit and they are life. Life to all that find them and HEALTH to all their flesh ! What about your soul????????
Looking for a recipe and I find the childrens hour.
funny shizznit pepl keep up the good laughs
ITS ANARCHY
it’s artichoke-archy.
i can’t bring myself to say fuck you.
WHAT A SAD BUNCH OF LOW LIFE LOSERS
Ha ha. Nice site.
Thanks to Lola for actually posting directions on how to cook the thing. (2 - 3 inches of water in a pot, boil it, put the ‘choke in, cover & simmer for 45 min)
You soccer moms (Yes, I mean YOU, you soccer mom!) who can’t handle it when people have a little fun need to relax. How does it affect you if Janet Jackson shows her boob or if a few people want to talk about shoving spiny green vegetables up their asses? When your husband is golfing and Trevor and Skyler are away at soccer practice, why don’t you invite us in for some artichoke and a good fuck?
lmfao! finally after reading all this fucking shit i learned how to cook an artichoke. Oh yeah…the ladies of wc4w rule : )
throw the shit on a grill…where the fuck am I?
huh?
but can you throw artichokes @ a wedding - instead of rice? itsa rumour ive heard…
doesnt help me much @ the sphincter comment…ew
i never knew who to fuckin cook one and i dont fuckin care but this shit is fuckin funny and wc4w does rule.
Well whatever you do, clean out the prickers, and oh yes, fuck you and ya artichoke hearts too!
does this have anything to do with Armageddon?
oh and BTW I am DEFINITELY puttin this shit on my cool links
ffs
happy anniversary..muahhh!!
gawd..mushie buggers (the artichokes i mean) LMFAO
hey you fucking fuckers…stay on topic! its all about the choke
fuck the choke I wanna fuck… oh and thank you baby… Happy Anniversary to you too darlin *lick* *bite* mmm artichokey
what the fuck is an artichoke anyways???
Ok…this has go to be the funniest shit I read today. You all are a fucking riot, and to the haters….Kiss my artichoke…Muah
ohhhhh- now i get it. its about a vegatable.
i would like to congratulate everyone involved on a year well spent. now FUCK OFF!
yall are funny!…..long live the “women lovin artichokes room” best chatroom on yahoo…*giggles*
The absolute best way to cook an artichoke is to shove a stalk up your pee-hole, marinate it in your urine for 3-5 hours, turning hourly. Then, pull it out of your bell-end, lightly flour, season with thyme and ginger, and then slide it into your ‘taint’ for 20 minutes per pound.
thank you.
This has to be the funnies post I’ve ever stumbled on by accident. I’m gonna go fuck my artichoke now. Party on, dudes!!!
funny ass site. but man, i really need to know how to cook my artichoke. and um.. most of the instructions on here are quite painful and i just want to it the delicious fucker, not have sex with it. hahaha.
Other ways to cook your choke:
- Immerse yourself in boiling oil and stare jealously at your choke reading through “How to cook silly buggers”.
- Hold a choke party and ask all the perverts, weirdos and Catholics round to help you make choke cocktails consisting of one part rum, two parts choke.
- Ask any conservative politician in England, the lead singer of INXS or that bloke who shot an own goal in the soccer - they all know how to choke.
Now go pack some fudge.
I AM NINJA!!!
You people fucking disgust me. Artichokes make me want to puke.
*goes back to having anal sex with large middle eastern men*
omgggggggg you peeps are fucking funny…imma cry im laffin too fucking much…weeeeeeeeee \:d/
That was the best laugh I’ve had in a long time. Thanks to all you weirdos. I have always maintained that artichokes were crafty little fuckers but who knew how much? Keep an eye out people. They’re everywhere.
I got sent here from a friend’s Livejournal. Hey, did anyone notice that the indignant person who’s bent on praying for y’all artichoke-fuckers and complains that “the filthy mind